Another Christmas come and gone

Well, today was a nice day. The kids enjoyed their presents. Adam was hysterical with some of his. He would play with a toy for 15 minutes before moving on to another one.

We went to a friends house for Christmas lunch. What a nice time. It was a shame we had to leave for the kids flight. We were there for 3 hours but the time just flew by. We are going to have them over after New Years though.

The kids got to their Mom's safely. We have already had two phone calls to "check in". I really hope they have a nice visit.

We're off to the East Coast tomorrow! I can't wait for my family to see how big Adam is getting. Happy Holidays!

Christmas Blessings

The past two years have had so many high's and low's. The Birth of my son, Adam. Meeting more friends, getting to stay at home from work to raise the kids, and finally getting custody of all three step children. I won't go into the lows, because with out them, the highs would not be possible.

We made some awesome friends this year. They invited us over for Christmas lunch prior to the kids departure to Texas. Such nice, wholesome, religious people. Ever since I met Carolina, I have felt that there was a reason we met. Call me crazy, call me religous, I don't care. God intended for us to be friends. Our kids are mostly the same age. I enjoy talking to Carolina about anything. Our relationship feels so natural.

So to anyone reading this, Merry Christmas. If you don't believe in Christ's birth, at least feel the joy and warmth of the season and reflect on all of your blessings. I wish you all the best and peace in your lives.

Christmas prep

So Christmas Break started early this year due to a series of snow storms. We had a good time out in the snow. Adam loved to eat it! It was quite cute. Darren got stranded on a business trip trying to come home. It took him about 12 hours for a 2 hour flight!

Everyone is getting excited. The kids will be going to see their Mom soon. I hope they have a really nice visit.

We have some awesome new friends that invited us over for Christmas lunch. They have 3 kids that are all close in age to our 3 older kids. So, that will be fun and hopefully take some of the edge off of the kids nervousness to fly.

I have to admit that I am excited for some quiet time the next week and a half. Darren, Adam, and I will be heading to the Northeast for New Years and Post Christmas with the family. So I am excited. We haven't seen them since August. Thank god for email and Facebook!

Well, happy holidays to anyone who may read this.

Seasons Greetings

So, most of my anger is now gone these days. Writing was therapeutic. So is going to Church on a regular basis and praying. So, I think we have all adjusted. The kids are finally going to see their Mom next week for Christmas (about 9 days). I have no idea what good or harm is coming towards them, but I truly hope that they have a nice visit. They need some one on one time with her and I hope that they get it.

The baby is getting big and running around like a mad man. The dogs do not find his ability to climb everything amusing. They are running out of hiding spots.

I've lost about 8 pounds. But I threw my back out and haven't gone to the gym in 2 weeks. I need to get back on the wagon pronto! Also, Adam loves the play room. It is more like a play land. It is good for both of us to get out every day.

We are supposed to get a winter storm tonight! Can't wait.

It's been a while

Well, life has balanced out so far.........Lucinda is not planning to take the kids over Thanksgiving. That means that her Mom and Dad aren't paying for it (finally giving her what she deserves!) But overall, the kids seem to be doing well. They don't even call her every day anymore.

I finally fixed my hair - thank goodness. But I had to cut it all off! Scary but it really doesn't look too bad.

My new obsession is losing these last 20 pounds of baby weight. I finally joined a gym and I am addicted to Wii Fit! It is a great tool if you haven't tried it. I love how it tells you if you aren't doing things correctly to get the most benefit out of your work out. So, those are my new hobbies.

Only one more month of soccer!!!!

Ikes!

Well, the rain has passed in Chicago. I have to say, it is astounding to see all the water on the sides of the roads, filling yards, creating lakes and streams..........I hope everyone has a safe and quick recovery. Especially those suffering from Hurricane Ike in TX and LA.

Caty is doing significantly better. She is like a new kid. No more tantrums, meltdowns, phone stalking.........it is amazing. She still misses her Mom, but it doesn't come up nearly as much.

As part of the new agreement, we were to give Lucinda information regarding any school pictures. Now, she doesn't pay child support or half of the required expenses (because she chooses to be a deadbeat parent and we were happy to see her go to Texas to get rid of her and the damage she does to the kids); but she doesn't even want to buy the kids school pictures! She had the audacity to ask for one of ours?! Tell me, what kind of POS doesn't want to pay for school pictures. She has a job, no child expenses and is living w/ a guy who pays all the house bills. PLEASE! If these kids even knew what a loser she is, they would be astounded. She isn't on drugs, she isn't a drunk (at least not yet). She is just the most selfish human being on the planet. It is astounding.

OK, I feel better now. Well, Wednesday the girls go to therapy. Hopefully we don't have to do this forever.

Weekend Commitments

Wow, I never thought I'd be a "Soccer Mom," but it was a weekend of commitments. Sabrina had soccer practice Friday night followed by a soccer game on Saturday. Caty had one on Saturday as well. Adam was completely off of his of nap schedule; is teething; and his nose is running like a faucet. I can't tell if it is his teeth, allergies, or a cold.

Sabrina has turned into our "problem child". Trent has turned into our "good" child. What a difference a summer makes! Sabrina isn't turning in homework and is talking in classes. She was "grounded" Sunday once we read her weekly progress report.

Caty had nightmares Saturday night. Everyone but Trent was up for 2-3 hours. It was awful. I have been exhausted ever since. She thought Sabrina was cut up, even after we showed her with the lights on that she fine. Then she thought her bruises from soccer were from her bed. It was a bad night. I was relieved for the kids to go back to school this morning.

It is getting cold here. Last fall it was in the 80's and 90's until the 2nd week of October (granted, that was very unusual weather for Chicago.) It seems this year God is balancing it out and fall has dropped in a little early. The low tonight is in the upper 40's!!!! Yuck. I need weather that I can bake myself in the sun! (My skin does not appreciate it, but I always wear SPF.) I've had Basal cell skin cancer at least once (if not twice but unconfirmed the second time).

Well, the rain is supposed to stop some time tonight. Bring on warmer weather please!!!

Mini Harvest

Late last winter, we moved to a smaller home. Numerous reasons, legal bills from the useless custody battle, bills, and most importantly, to allow me to stay home with Adam. With the move, I lost my spacious backyard with a killer garden. So this year, I have potted plants all over the back porch and front balcony. I shouldn't complain, compared to many gardens, I still have a lot. I have given the neighbors my herbs (basil, thyme, dill, and rosemary). I actually have cucumbers and jalapeno peppers. I tried tomato plants, only one is still making it, but no tomatoes have popped out yet. So, today was the first day of making pesto. I know it is green, but for those of you that like natural food and herbs........mmmmmmmmm. Thyme pesto was so good that I am going to have to make more (Thyme pesto is a first for me). I made my staples cilantro pesto and homemade salsa. Soon I have to make basil pesto. Basil is my favorite plant, so I have plenty of it growing.

I have started an exercise regimen since I haven't kicked the last 20 lbs and Adam is a year old. I walked for 45 minutes with Adam, 10 minutes on the bike, and started on the Boflex again. I have to work out (not that I ever sit) to burn off what I love to eat. It's sad, I don't eat junk food, I just overeat.

Well, off to finish the last bit of homework with the 12 year old.

You know he loves you when...

Yesterday my husband decided to help me be frugal. I had a hair appointment scheduled for this coming weekend but with the added expenses of 4 kids full time, we may have to forgo it. (Yes, he doesn't pay child support, but Lucinda doesn't pay for the kids because she has decided to be a deadbeat Mom). I don't work because there are 4 kids to watch, it just doesn't make sense.

Anyway, he patiently pulled my hair through a highlighting kit. I think it took an hour and a half to pull my hair through.........He helped me put the color in and made sure I didn't miss anything. I washed my hair and tada......it looked frighteningly awful! Straight up, trailer park, blond awful.

So at 11 pm last night, we finished dying my hair back to it's original dark brown. It still looks bad, but good in comparison to the freakish blond look. With that, my lesson learned is go to the hair salon or don't touch your hair!

Best Day in a While

Today was miraculously calm. Caty pulled herself together for the past 24 hours, thank goodness. It may have helped because got a new bike (her old one fell apart). So she had something fun to look forward to today. She spent the entire day outside (as did Sabrina).

Adam was a blast. He watched the Penn State game with me. He enjoyed clapping when I cheered at every touch down. I hope he goes there as well.

My husband and I have had a wake up call this week. $400 on groceries in 2 days. Although, we did make a run to Sams Club, something you need to do when feeding a family of 6. So, even though we spent a lot, some of it will carry through for a while. (I hope!!)

Well, I'm looking forward to Church tomorrow. It seems to calm me down, at least temporarily. Happy Labor Day weekend!

Dear Diary

Another day down. I'm exhausted but somewhere in the chaos, I think some good will come. I had a good day with Adam. He is standing on his own now, but hasn't mastered the step forward yet.

Caty is struggling. Everything is an argument. She will look at you and deliberately not listen. I feel bad for her, but can't reward her behavior. If I do, then she will think it is acceptable. It is painful to send an emotionally drained 6 year old to time out, to witness the tantrums, and to think that her mother is delusional in her own life.

Sabrina had soccer today. She seems to be doing really well. In fact, she keeps saying that she is relieved that she didn't move away from her Dad. They are close.


If anyone is reading this and you are thinking about moving away from your kids or you are in a custody battle to remove your kids from another responsible parent, please consider your kids. There is no win for them. They lose a parent either way and possibly siblings and other family. I'm watching the destruction each and every day. Don't make the same mistake as Lucinda.

A Day in Therapy

Today my step daughters have gone to see a therapist. After the year that they have had, they need it. It was like cutting an open wound to Caty (6 years old.)  How does she even comprehend that her favorite person in the world, her mother, has left her. She can't. She doesn't take comfort when I sit with her tonight, while she cries for her Mom. I'm helpless and can't make things better for her. We provide a safe and loving home, but I have no idea how long this healing process will take. I'm not sure that it will ever end.


I guess I should back up and explain the train wreck that is.......Lucinda remarried a few years ago. She married someone that already has 2 divorces under his belt and 4 kids from the marriages. One child lives in another state and the other three moved last summer. Her new ex decides to move to be with his kids. And after 6 months of court documents and lawyers, Lucinda decides to quit the custody battle she started and just leave the kids. The oldest, 12 already lives with us because "he caused to many problems." But the girls, weren't prepared to see their Mom leave. They assumed that her promises of living their lives elsewhere would come true. 


I wasn't sure I'd be a Mom, let alone a Step Mom.  But I now have a beautiful one year old.   I get to stay home with him and watch him grow.  I can't imagine life any other way.